For over 21 years I have shared life with this beautiful woman. 19 years ago today, we wed. There are moments in life where words fall short in their ability to explain or describe the joy and contentment of walking through beauty, struggle, change, and uncertainty with the person you love. She knows me better than anyone else on this earth… she’s seen my ugliest days and moments… has experienced pain because of my choices, words, looks, and neglect, and she still loves me. She must be crazy. Or I must have lucked out in convincing her to share life with me because I’m a richer man today because of my relationship with her.
I believe wealth is found in loving relationships, where people know how to care for themselves and others, and can set appropriate boundaries so people are protected and are still vulnerable to experience love. Today I celebrate, like many other days throughout the year, the love between my wife and I which truly is like a fine wine, or a great bottle of aged scotch, or heck, maybe even an aged bottle of Trader Joe’s special ale (it’s really good!). There truly is no secret to a relationship of love and intimacy that can last over time. There’s no one book or study or step-by-step program that teaches you how to maintain and sustain rich love. Rich love is experienced when commitment and sacrifice are present, and you either choose to notice it and enjoy it in the moment or you choose to see or want something different and totally miss it. This kind of love is shown all the time within our family as well. The joy of it is captured in this photo.
I guess what I’m trying to say is I believe love is caught more than taught, and it is found to be most powerful in the midst of suffering, confusion, and grief. Yeah, I know, I don’t really like that previous statement, but it’s what I know to be true. Coming out on the other side of those things with the one you love, is greater than any drug. It keeps you coming back for more. It’s euphoric and full of a weird kind of pleasure from making it through something difficult, that then allows something deep and intimate and erotic to take place, and it’s good.
Our love has been far from perfect, but it has been good! I would do these 19 years with her all over again and I look forward to the next 19… hopefully with much more wisdom and less foolish mistakes. 😊
Happy 19th Anniversary to us!